Jane grabbed the microphone and called me up to the front.
“And now, let’s welcome my best friend, Bree!”
My mind flashed back to the message Jane had hastily retracted yesterday:
[Tomorrow, I’m setting Bree up with a balding old man. This is going to be hilarious. You guys better show up!]
I glanced at Frank, who was indeed the “quality man” Jane had mentioned.
As I walked onto the front, Jane leaned in close and whispered, “Bree, this guy is my husband’s boss. He’s got a house, a car, and a kid. You’d be set as a mom with no hassle.”
The closer I got, the more visibly uncomfortable Frank became.
By the time we made eye contact, he was sweating bullets.
I waved my phone at him subtly, signaling for him to play along.
He caught on and gave a respectful nod.
Jane, misreading his discomfort as shyness, started up with the microphone again.
“I’m just so thrilled! Not only am I celebrating my son’s baby shower, but I’m also setting my best friend up with such a wealthy, high-status man. I really am a beauty with a heart of gold!”
The guests exchanged smirks and stifled their laughter. I snatched the microphone from Jane’s hand.