The children noticed the change before anyone else fully did. Not in words at first, but in their bodies. The next time Carol invited us over “for burgers, keep it casual,” I said no. We already had plans. The plans were pizza at home and a movie on the couch, but they were still plans, and that was enough. Lily looked at me with a kind of tentative hope that made my chest ache. Noah asked if we were in trouble.

“No,” I said. “We’re just making different choices now.”

“What kind of choices?” he asked.

“The kind where people have to treat us well if they want to spend time with us.”

He accepted that more easily than I expected. Children understand fairness in the body before adults manage to cloud it with rationalization.