I watched my father throw my clothes, my books, and the last photo of my mother into the fire like my life meant nothing. Then he looked at me and said, “This is what happens when you disobey me.” I said nothing. Six years later, I called him and whispered, “Check your mailbox.”

The thing that kept me going through the slow years was simpler than I expected: I liked the work. Not in a motivational-speech way. In a practical, daily way. I liked standing in a broken building and understanding what it needed. I liked the specific problem of figuring out which repair to do first so that the second one would make sense. I liked writing up a bid and having the numbers come in close to what I’d projected. I liked that the job was honest in the sense that it either got done or it didn’t, it either held or it fell apart, and you knew the difference immediately rather than after years of equivocation.

My father had operated on the opposite principle. He used ambiguity the way some people used leverage — keeping the rules vague enough that he could always claim you had broken them, keeping approval contingent enough that you were always slightly in debt to him for it. Construction was the antidote to that. Either the beam was plumb or it wasn’t. Either the permit passed inspection or it didn’t. Either the client signed off or they called back with a complaint. There was no version of the work that rewarded uncertainty.

I learned to love that.